


Love Shouldn't Hurt

by Likemycoffee



Category: As the World Turns
Genre: Domestic Violence, Dubious Consent, M/M, characters with issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-23
Updated: 2016-12-23
Packaged: 2018-09-11 12:49:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8980369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Likemycoffee/pseuds/Likemycoffee
Summary: Originally written in 2009. Reposting here. Totally AU. Luke and Kevin are together but things are goin wrong. Then Luke meets Noah.





	1. Prologue - Luke suffers Domestic Violence

The blows were reigning down on him and he couldn’t fight back. His head felt like it was going to split open. He saw stars. He was screaming, begging the man to stop but he was stronger and Luke couldn’t fight back. He tasted blood in his mouth. His lip had been split open. Luke fell to the ground.

That’s when it stopped finally. Luke pulled his knees into his chest and lay on the kitchen floor curled up in a ball. 

‘Why do you keep making me hurt you like this Luke?’ the voice sounded far away. Luke closed his eyes. He felt dizzy.

‘I’m sorry Luke.’ Luke felt a hand stroking his forehead softly. That same hand had been punching him only minutes before.

‘You know I love you.’ 

Luke didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. In fact he felt too scared to do either. This wasn’t what he thought love should feel like.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after

Luke studied his reflection in the bathroom mirror. It could have been worse. There was only one bruise just below his left eye; make up covered it pretty well. At least he could still go to work. He’d already lost a lot of time over the last few months and he couldn’t lose his job. If he got fired... he didn’t want to even think what the reaction would be.

He walked downstairs and into the kitchen. Kevin was making breakfast. He turned as Luke came in and he smiled at him. ‘Morning baby,’ he said ushering Luke to sit at the kitchen table. ‘Do you want coffee? Something to eat?’

Luke just shook his head not meeting his boyfriend’s eyes. Kevin stopped. ‘Luke,’ he began ‘I’m sorry, alright. You know I didn’t mean it.’

‘That’s funny Kevin because it felt like you meant it, definitely while you were punching me it felt like you meant it.’ 

‘I hate myself for doing that to you Luke.’ Kevin continued, ‘I just got so angry when I saw you talking to Casey. I was jealous. I admit it I was jealous.’

‘We were just talking.’ Luke replied.

‘You were all over him Luke, I couldn’t stand it. I saw you. You want to be with him don’t you?’

‘No!’ Luke exclaimed ‘I don’t want to be with Casey, I want to be with you.’

‘Then you need to show me Luke.’ Kevin said ‘You need to show me you love me. Throwing yourself at guys right in front of me, is that any way to show me you love me?’

Luke was silent. He thought back to the events of the previous evening. They had been out celebrating Luke’s birthday. The Snyders had thrown him a surprise party at the Lakeview. All of Luke’s friends had been there – including Casey. He had been away travelling around Europe, Luke hadn’t known he was back in Oakdale, he been really surprised to see him. He had given him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. He hadn’t been thinking. The kiss had been too much.

‘I know I was wrong.’ Kevin said ‘but you were wrong too Luke – you shouldn’t have kissed him.’

‘I’m sorry.’ Luke said.

Kevin put his arms around Luke and squeezed him tight. Luke winced at the sharp pain in his side as Kevin’s hand pushed against the fresh bruises on his side. 

‘It’s ok baby. You know I can never stay mad at you.’ Kevin looked into his boyfriend’s eyes and smiled. ‘I’ll make it up to you tonight ok?’

 

When Luke arrived at work he kept his head down and walked to his desk quickly, not wanting to make eye contact with anyone. He didn’t want anyone asking him questions. He just wanted to get on with his work. He had been at his desk for half an hour when Mike, his boss came over to see him. 

‘Luke,’ he began, then he noticed the bruise on Luke’s face and his expression changed, ‘what happened to you?’

‘Oh,’ said Luke blushing, ‘It’s nothing. I got hit in the eye with a basketball.’

Mike smiled ‘You really need to be more careful with those basketballs kid.’

Luke laughed but inside he felt like crying. ‘Yeah I know.’

Mike suddenly seemed to remember why he was there. He turned to another man who Luke had only just noticed had been standing beside him.

‘Luke Snyder this is Noah Mayer. He’s just joined us today. I want you to show him around, show him the ropes, you know. He’ll be working with you on the Ellison account.’

Luke nodded. He looked at Noah Mayer. He was tall, with dark hair and as he met Noah’s eyes Luke took a deep breath. Noah had the bluest eyes that Luke had ever seen. 

Mike turned to Noah, ‘Luke will bring you up to speed on the Ellison account. You’ll be ok with him.’

‘Thanks.’ Noah said as Mike walked away.

Noah took his seat at the empty desk next to Luke’s. ‘So...’ he began.

Luke smiled. He couldn’t take his eyes off Noah Mayer. He almost forgot about the pain in his ribs. 

‘You want me to show you around?’ he said.

‘Yeah that would be great.’

Noah stood up to follow Luke, he was going to like working here, he thought to himself. This Luke Snyder had the most adorable smile.


	3. Chapter 3

To Luke, the day at work passed much more quickly than usual. He had given Noah a tour of the office and then had spent a couple of hours telling him about the Ellison project, a huge advertising account that the company were bidding for. Luke and Noah’s team were organising the pitch that they would put to the Ellison executives. Landing this account would be a massive coup for the company. Luke showed Noah the work that had been done so far.

‘It’s good,’ Noah said. But there was something in his voice that told Luke he wasn’t convinced.

‘You don’t sound so sure.’

Noah looked into Luke’s eyes and Luke was struck once more by how beautiful he was. ‘What’s wrong with me?’ he thought to himself, ‘I’ve got Kevin at home and I’m checking out guys at work? No wonder he doesn’t trust me.’   
‘It’s not that,’ Noah continued interrupting Luke’s train of thought. ‘It’s just... I don’t know. Don’t you think all this has been done before?’

Luke nodded earnestly. ‘I know what you mean. I’ve been saying this to Mike at the meetings but I keep being over-ruled.’

‘Well maybe we should put our heads together and see if we can’t come up with something better.’

‘Sure,’ Luke smiled. 

 

Luke and Noah spent the next few hours brainstorming different ideas together. They eventually narrowed it down to a few that they both agreed had potential. 

‘We’ll continue this tomorrow,’ Luke said ‘I’ve had a good day today Noah – thank you.’

‘For what?’ Noah asked puzzled.

Luke blushed, ‘well... I just haven’t had a lot of good days lately.’

Noah smiled and Luke thought he would melt, for a few seconds, then he remembered Kevin and immediately felt guilty.

‘I should be thanking you Luke,’ Noah began ‘I was so nervous starting here today but you’ve been really great. Hey, let me buy you a drink to celebrate.’

‘Celebrate what?’

‘My first day,’ said Noah ‘and the start of a beautiful partnership.’

Luke could honestly say in that moment there was nothing he would like more than to go for a drink with Noah but he knew that was impossible.

‘I’m sorry Noah I can’t,’ Luke said.

Noah looked disappointed. ‘Oh, well if you don’t want to...’

‘No it’s not that,’ Luke said ‘it’s just, I have plans tonight... with my boyfriend.’

‘Oh.’ Noah said.

‘Is that a problem?'

‘What? You already having plans?’

‘No, me having a boyfriend.’

‘Why would it be?’ Noah asked, slightly offended.

‘I don’t know, it’s just some people have a problem with it.’

Noah laughed. 'No Luke, I don't have a problem with it. It's just that it's just my luck to ask out a guy who already has a boyfriend.'

‘Is he saying what I hope he’s saying?’ Luke thought to himself. ‘Are you gay?’ he asked.

Noah nodded ‘Yeah.’

'And you were asking me out?'

'Well yeah - but i mean i understand that you have a boyfriend.'

‘Yes. Oh yes.’ Luke smiled at Noah and immediately felt another pang of guilt again as he remembered Kevin.

‘Why? Why am I flirting with him?’

‘I have to go.’ Luke said suddenly ‘I’ll see you tomorrow Noah.’

He turned and walked out of the office leaving Noah alone.

 

Luke approached the door of the apartment he and Kevin had shared for two years. He felt the familiar sense of dread. He could never be certain what was waiting for him on the other side of that door. He turned the key in the lock and entered.

Kevin was standing by the dining table lighting the candles. He turned to Luke, ‘Hey baby.’

Luke smiled ‘hey, what’s all this?’

‘I told you. We’re having a romantic night.’ Kevin pulled the chair out and Luke sat down. 

‘I made pasta – I know it’s not as good as yours but I tried.’

‘It smells good.’ Luke replied.

They sat down to eat and Kevin poured the wine. Luke took a sip, he wasn’t a big drinker.

‘Drink up baby we’re celebrating.’ Kevin said as he downed his own glass and poured another.

'What are we celebrating?'

‘The fact that I love you.’

Luke smiled but Kevin’s face turned serious. ‘Listen honey, I’ve got to go away for a few days.’ He said.

Luke frowned, ‘why?’

‘It’s work babe – you know how it is. There’s a big conference in New York and they want me to go.’

‘When?’

‘I leave tomorrow.’

Luke’s frown deepened. ‘You never mentioned it before.’

‘Well they only told me today. What’s the matter Luke? Don’t you trust me?’ There was something in Kevin’s tone that made Luke nervous.

‘Don’t be silly of course I trust you.’

‘Because honestly Luke if anything I should be the one not trusting you – the way you were with Casey the other night.’ 

Luke sensed the danger. He’d had plenty of practise. ‘I’m sorry.’ He whispered ‘It’s just – I’m going to miss you.’

Kevin’s face softened. ‘Well babe we still have tonight. Why don’t you let me show you how much you’re going to have to miss?’ 

Kevin pulled Luke to his feet and kissed him. Luke couldn’t help it, he flinched at his touch. 

‘What’s wrong?’ Kevin asked ‘don’t you want to?’ 

Luke didn’t want to. He was sore from the beating the night before and he was tired. All he wanted was to go to sleep. ‘Of course I do.’ He said. 

‘Well good.’ Kevin led Luke into the bedroom.

An hour later when Kevin was passed out on the bed, Luke got up and walked into the living room. He sat down on the couch, pulled his legs up to his chest and cried.


	4. Chapter 4

‘Luke, hey Luke,’ Luke awoke to see Kevin’s eyes staring at him in the darkness of the bedroom. 

‘What time is it?’ Luke asked.

‘It’s 5am. I’ve got to go. I’ve got a plane to catch.’ Kevin whispered. He leant down to kiss Luke on the lips.

‘O.K.’ Luke said sleepily, ‘Have a good trip.’

‘I’ll call you when I get there Luke. I love you.’

‘Love you too.’ 

Luke rolled over as Kevin left the bedroom. A few moments later he heard the apartment door close. Luke went back to sleep.

 

Five hours later Luke and Noah sat in the briefing room listening to Mike give them updates on the Ellison project.

‘I’m sure I don’t need to remind you people that this is our number one priority at the moment – all the other accounts are on the back burner. Pass them down to Phil’s team unless it’s something that absolutely can’t wait. I’ve scheduled a meeting for Monday morning to finalise the ideas for our pitch so bring along your best ideas. Any questions?’

When there were none Mike dismissed the meeting. Luke and Noah walked back to their desks in the far corner of the office. ‘At least that means we have the weekend to work on our idea.’ Noah said enthusiastically to Luke, ‘Do you want to get together tomorrow?’

Luke looked nervous for a minute. Noah seemed to pick up on something being wrong. 

‘Don’t worry Luke I wasn’t coming on to you.’ Noah smiled, ‘We can be friends though right?’

Luke nodded, ‘yeah Noah of course. Look, I’m sorry about running off last night, I just really had to get home.’

‘It’s cool. You’re eager to get home to your boyfriend. That’s a good thing. He must be something special.’

Luke didn’t really know how to respond to that, ‘Oh he’s something alright.’ He said.

 

It was around 2pm when Luke felt his mobile phone vibrating in his pocket. He looked at the caller display – Kevin.

‘Hey,’ he answered.

‘Hey gorgeous,’ Kevin slurred on the other end of the phone line. ‘I’m just calling to tell you I’m here. New York is amazing.’

‘Where are you?’ Luke asked he could hear a lot of people in the background. 

‘I’m at the hotel babe, my room is fucking fantastic.’ Kevin was really slurring his words.

‘Are you ok?’ Luke asked concerned, ‘have you been drinking?’

‘Just a couple babe, with the guys from work – you know how it is.’

‘Yeah,’ said Luke, ‘I think I do.’

‘Look I’ll call you later tonight. You’ll be home won’t you?’ Kevin asked.

‘Of course – look Kevin I’m really busy here. I’m glad you’re having a good time. I’ll speak to you later.’

‘Ok babe – love you.’

‘You too,’ Luke ended the call. It took him a minute to realise that Noah was watching him. 

‘My boyfriend Kevin,’ Luke explained, ‘He’s had to go to New York for a few days with work.’

‘What does he do?’ Noah asked. He was genuinely interested in knowing more about Luke’s life. He couldn’t explain the attraction he felt for the blonde who he’d only known for 2 days but he liked the way he felt when he was around Luke and he wanted to spend more time with him.

‘He works for an engineering firm. They’ve sent him to a conference.’ 

‘Man, that sucks – how long is he gone for?’

‘Five days – he’ll be back Wednesday night.’ 

‘How did you meet him?’

‘We were high school sweethearts.’ Luke smiled. ‘We were best friends for years, I kind of always had a crush on him, then one day I just plucked up the courage to tell him how I felt and it turned out he’d been feeling the same way. We’ve been together since senior year.’ 

Noah smiled. Luke just couldn’t get enough of that smile. ‘That’s so sweet.’

Luke blushed, ‘So tell me about you Noah Mayer,’ he asked.

‘There’s not much to tell,’ Noah said.

‘What, no skeletons in the closet?’

‘Not really,’ Noah said. ‘I’m an only child. My dad’s in the military so I moved around a lot as a kid. We never got on. I was always a bit of a disappointment to him. I came out when I was 18 and he threw me out, said he never wanted to speak to me again.’

‘Oh Noah,’ Luke reached out and touched Noah’s arm. As soon as he made contact with his skin he felt like an electric shock passed through his body, he immediately pulled his hand back.

‘What’s wrong?’ Noah asked,

‘I think you’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen’ Luke thought to himself.

‘Nothing,’ he said ‘It’s just so sad your dad treated you like that.’ 

‘Yeah well,’ Noah shrugged, ‘It’s his loss, he knows where to find me if he ever wants to make up.’

‘Don’t you see your mom either?’

‘She died when I was three,’ 

‘Oh,’ Luke stammered ‘I’m sorry Noah – that was a real foot in mouth moment.’

‘Don’t be sorry,’ Noah replied, ‘you weren’t to know. So yeah, basically just me all alone,’ Noah was smiling. Luke smiled back.

‘What about your love life?’

‘You are nosey Luke Snyder,’ he joked. ‘I’ve been single for about 18 months, there was a guy before that his name was Tony.’

‘What happened?’

‘Just didn’t work out.’

‘Sorry,’ Luke said ‘I’m being too personal.’

‘No it’s ok. It was just one of those things.’ Noah said.

 

Later that night Luke was sitting alone in his apartment thinking about Noah. Why did he get to him so badly? When he’d touched his arm ... He hadn’t felt this kind of attraction to anyone except Kevin. Kevin – he’d said he was going to call but he hadn’t. ‘He’s probably busy,’ he said to himself. He looked at his mobile; it was 7 o’clock that meant it was 8 o’clock in New York. Surely the conference wasn’t still going on? Suddenly his mobile started ringing. ‘Hello?’ Luke answered it without looking at the caller display. 

‘Hey buddy,’

‘Hey Casey, how are you doing?’

‘Good,’ Casey replied, ‘listen Luke do you want to come for a drink? Me and some of the guys are at this new bar ‘Spirit’.’

‘Erm – I don’t know Case I’m actually waiting for Kevin to call.’ 

‘He can call your mobile can’t he? Come on just for a while, we never hang out anymore.’

Luke felt guilty. It was true he hadn’t spent time with any of his friends lately. ‘I’ve been busy with work.’ He told himself trying to convince himself that was the real reason.

‘Ok Casey,’ he said impulsively. ‘Give me half an hour and I’ll be there.’ 

 

Exactly half an hour later Luke walked into Spirit. He spotted Casey and his friends at a table in the far corner. He walked towards the bar and ordered a beer. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned around startled, ‘Can I buy you that beer?’

‘Noah!’ Luke exclaimed ‘What are you doing here?’

Luke looked Noah up and down out of his work clothes he looked even more stunning. He was wearing a tight t-shirt that showed off his chest to perfection and a pair of jeans ‘Oh my God how did he fit into those?’ Luke said to himself they were so tight. 

‘Some friends of mine dragged me along,’ Noah explained as he paid for Luke’s beer, ‘I wasn’t going to come but seeing you, I’m glad I did.’ 

‘I’m meeting my friend Casey,’ Luke said. ‘He’s over there.’ Luke pointed in Casey’s direction. 

‘No way,’ said Noah. ‘I didn’t know you knew Casey, that’s who I’m here with.’

Luke looked surprised, ‘really?’ 

‘Yeah, I don’t know him that well but his girlfriend Maddie is my best friend.’

‘Oh my God,’ Luke said.

As Luke followed Noah over to the table he couldn’t help but think this night was just getting better and better. 

He didn’t hear his mobile ringing for the third time in his pocket.


End file.
